True partnerships are what make love last.

When it comes to a successful long-term relationship, people should look for a partner who makes them feel safe, desired, respected and valued. The best marriages are ones where both people are truly partners. And the relationship takes work, not the “nails on a chalkboard” kind of work, but work to keep it fun and full of fire.

If you’re in that rare group of love-at-first-sighters who have made your relationship work in the long run — smile and pat yourself on the back. For others who are still on the quest for love, it’s best to assume that you’ll go according to the rule not the exception: It will likely take kissing many frogs, and having several dates with each one to figure it out.

To maximize your chances to find love, be open to love in different packages, and make sure that the person who lights you on fire will also be a good long-term bet.